What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
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