Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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