He is such a slut. More and more my type.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
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