Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
