he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
