I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
23 People Have Step Parents That Are Younger Than Them
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking