Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
