I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
