Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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