we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
Randomize