Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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