let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
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