my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize