mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
