I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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