8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
