I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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