I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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