Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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