naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
third nipple confirmed
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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