I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Randomize
