Your tits are I can't wait for
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
This is my life. Enjoy the view
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Randomize
