Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I am one with the molecules
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
