Rock
Scissors
Fuck
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
