I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
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