I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I have tasted many bathrooms
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize