just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize