i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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