I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Randomize
