We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
