we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize