i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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