Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
