loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
