Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
