one word: firstdatebathroomanal
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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