I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
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Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
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Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
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Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge