i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
