"it" just moved
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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