I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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