Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize