she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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