I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
