I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
