What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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