I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
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