U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Go christen that room with your naked body.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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