shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Randomize