How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
