Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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