actually, I'm a sock model
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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