And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize